The Domestically Disabled Diva: A Motivational Speech for Your Vacuum

business woman dancing with her vacuumQ: Dear Abby,

I’m in a bit of a conundrum in that my vacuum has decided to quit working as hard as it used to work for me. While I have a new dustbuster that I can use for the tile, that does nothing for the carpet! Any suggestions for how I can kind get my vacuum back to the way it once was?

A: I’m very into vacuuming and celebrate “Swiffer Sunday” weekly, so I understand your frustrations. I suggest you focus on communication between you and said rebel vacuum, perhaps try and pep it up a bit by reciting the following motivational speech: Continue reading

The Domestically Disabled Diva: How to Change a Shower Curtain Liner

Every few months I am reminded that there is yet another task that somehow manages to highlight my domestic disabilities—changing the shower curtain liner.

This is a task that must be done on a regular basis, lest one plans on growing an assortment of invasive species in their shower. But like putting a new key on a keychain, it’s often complicated by a) the ridiculous metal rings that have to be opened and closed and b) the fact that I’m me. Continue reading